And my God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)
Twelve years ago, I was a career woman working out of my home as managing editor of a computer magazine. My oldest daughter was in preschool, and my youngest daughter had recently been born. When my youngest became mobile at 10 months, I had a decision to make. I chose to leave my job and stay home with her, because I didn’t want to begin the cycle of daycare that my older daughter had lived through.
Then, a year ago, after 25 years of marriage, I became a single mom. My older daughter is 16 and the younger is 12. When my daughters and I moved to our present home last September, my daughters fully expected me to go out and get a job. My ex-husband expected the same. But my focus and priority was still to be a stay-at-home mom, regardless of the circumstances. And in my heart, I had the assurance that it was God’s will, too.
I decided that I would get back into my writing and editorial career via freelancing so that I could work from home, and trust that God would supply. I had heard a story from a good friend about her son, who was married and a father of 3, and had recently lost his job in a small town where similar jobs were scarce. In the year ensuing that event, God had richly supplied and had changed her son’s heart so completely that he told his mother that it had been the best year of his life. I took that to heart–and to God–and asked Him to do the same for me.
During the first three or four months after we moved to our new home, my girls kept asking me when I was going to find a job. I told them that I was going to stay home and find work as a freelancer. They found it odd…it was so unconventional. They had known a lot of single parents who worked outside of the home. And even I knew it was a bold move–trusting God to allow me to continue to be a stay-at-home mom when clearly income was important.
Let me say that when I moved to our new home, I was not destitute. God had richly supplied money from an inheritance, so I had a nest egg. And I am also receiving support from my ex-husband. However, I still need extra income particularly since my daughter is a senior in high school and in addition, I need to work toward the time when the support for myself and my children ends.
I have begun to depend on God in a way I never did–or had to–before. I have begun to pray in a way I never did before. I now ask God to stretch our resources–the gas in my car, our food, our water and electricity. And He’s faithful. As I wrote in an earlier post, I have a new saying that I whisper to the Lord on a regular basis: “Always enough.” Because there always is. There’s always enough paper in the printer, gas in the car, and food in the refrigerator to meet our needs. It’s no longer a frightening thing. It’s a head-out-the-window, wind-in-your-face adventure.
And by virtue of being an adventure, it’s not necessarily predictable. My freelancing business is growing very, very slowly. And while I could be frustrated about that, I’m not, because God is supplying what we need. It will come in His time. I’m doing my part and I know He is doing His.
I believe that if we feel the conviction in our hearts to do God’s will, even if it seems unconventional and even a little radical, we should proceed and ask God to supply. Be sure that you ask Him and feel His “yes” in your heart before you move forward. And if you’re new at it as I’ve been, trusting God in this way is kind of scary, but also thrilling and exhilarating. As I write, I have some sizable financial commitments that I’m not sure how they’ll be fulfilled. But you know what? Every single month since I purchased my home, I’ve sat down at my kitchen table and placed the bills before me, and with my hands on them, I’ve prayed over them and thanked God for His provision. And every month I’ve had the money to pay those bills–and then some.
I have a tendency to look ahead a few months and wonder how I’ll cross those financial mountains at that time. But then I remember that we’ve already come a full year, and God has been inordinately faithful. My rich and faithful God will continue, month by month, to supply all my needs.